Real excerpts from watching Men's Figure Skating last night on my couch with my boyfriend (I'm sorry for this MJ)

"THAT is some beautiful skating."
"He is just a pleasure to watch."
"Yeah, the younger guys were just point-to-point. There is a fluidity here."





"Oh my god he deserved better than THAT. He just skated his heart out."
"We'll see where he's at in 2014."






"Oh he's just dead."
"He's just gettin' through it."
"He wants to to end."
"He wants to go home."










"Do the quad, do it for America." (This was said without satire or irony. I was being serious.)
And he went for the triple
"Awwww, come on. It's the Olympics for Christ's sake."
"The triple was clean. If he keeps it clean like that he'll be on that podium."






"He looks like a hitman."
"Or blonde Adrian Brody."